


We'll watch the stars

by Saturnjamesbuchanan



Category: Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Canon Compliant, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, Comics/Movie Crossover, Complete, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, OTP Feels, One Shot, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, WinterWidow Week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:34:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29566191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saturnjamesbuchanan/pseuds/Saturnjamesbuchanan
Summary: Winterwidow stuff because I'm in my feels.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov
Kudos: 20





	We'll watch the stars

**Author's Note:**

> the greatest comic book OTP ever :') 
> 
> I'm debating writing a part two

The last thing Bucky saw was the stars. They were hidden by a blurring sheen of blue as the cold ice began to creep into his every waking thought, taunting his survival instinct as the cold atmosphere chained his body down, pulling him towards the line of unconsciousness. But they were still visible, the light stretching across his vision. They were what his bloodied and bruised right arm reached out to - ignoring the searing pain that followed from his movements - stretching until a muscle in his shoulder pulled, leaving a dull thrum in its wake, and his fingertips were numb from the sharp air above. He heard the voices. Loud, angry voices making their way towards him, unbeknownst to him they were ready to turn him into a killing machine - they were not the saving grace he prayed for. They were not Steve. He heard the voices.

But he saw the stars. 

/ / / 

It was the early morning of the red room ‘graduation’. So early, in fact, that Natasha Romanoff had not yet been unleashed from the handcuffs securing her to her bed. She was used to the irritating rubbing of the cold metal grinding against her skin, enflaming her skin a colour almost as red as the ledger that stained blood red in her hair. 

As the other girls slept, their dreams no doubt poisoned with the promise that today they would complete their training just as Natasha’s were, the red-head lifted her drowsy head, covering her eyes slightly as the bright shine of the moon beamed down through the singular barred window of the living quarters. She could not bring herself to sleep. She had never even imagined having kids, the way she was raised kids were just dragged into her line of work (no matter how much her instructors attempted to brainwash her with subliminal messaging her morals proved strong enough to not wish her life upon anybody else), but it was the idea that the people. The monsters who had raised her had the control over her that they could make that choice for her… Natasha hated being out of control. 

Each day she killed another human - whether they were innocent or not - was the day she lost a little bit more control. Each day she returned to the cold and lifeless room she was forced to share, she lost a little bit more control. Each day she returned to the same stars in the sky, she lost a bit more control. She grew to hate them. All of them. The stars, the people, the corpses. She tried to escape in any way that she could: breaking rules, overpowering guards, even attacking her mentors, alas they all saw it as a sign of her development. Obedience they could teach later. 

Only a day ago she even tried to fail her physical exams - something that was required for her to be able to attend this dreaded ‘Graduation’ that was now mere hours away - yet they had seen right through her. They always saw through her. No matter how much she hid it, the red room was her identity, they had taught her everything she knew, gave her everything they had. To them… She was predictable. 

She took another look out of the small window as the sky reached dawn and slowly began to shine its beautiful ombre of oranges and pinks. The last few stars remained, whether they were in her head or clinging on to the remnants of the night she could not tell. Whatever happened that day the stars would keep moving. 

A girl next to her shook slightly, a nightmare reaching past her subconscious and into the real world. She could think later, she needed to sleep. 

As she lay her head down once again, savouring the last few hours of bliss before the moment she had been dreading, the nightmares that haunted the other girls did not come to her. The fears, the memories, the inevitable futures did not seem to loom over her quite as heavily as they usually did, as she dreamt she did not see the darkness. 

She saw the stars. 

/ / /

It had been six months after Bucky had left Wakanda. Life was uneasy but it was getting there. The stoic Winter Soldier had not made a single public appearance. 

Headlines ran wild, ‘Man Out Of Time - Hero Or Villain?’ or ‘The Winter Soldier - Who Is He?’ 

Media channels camped outside the Avengers compound, hoping to catch even the faintest glimpse of the infamous Bucky Barnes. Of course, Pepper had handled the brunt of the fake stories and smears spreading like wildfire but it would be a lie to say that Bucky didn’t need to address the public anytime soon. The general population were still unsure, this man had been a killing assassin for as long as most of them had been alive, he had attacked beloved billionaire Tony Stark for goodness sake! 

That was how Bucky found himself standing at the Compound rooftop, he smirked to himself at the thought of jumping. The macabre image taunting his super soldier blood, the worst he would get was a broken ankle. The city lights had always been too harsh on his eyes - after all growing up in the forties the billboards he saw today would take up half the power in Brooklyn - but when they were all illuminated against the shadowed walls he thought that they were one of the few joys he didn’t mind about the modern world. He knows he could have it a lot worse - a lot of the public had already taken a liking to him, mainly thanks to Steve’s golden-boy reputation, and Tony had begrudgingly allowed him to stay at one of the most advanced buildings in the world. 

He was distant to the others on the team - excluding Steve of course - he assumed that they wanted to stay out of his way so he made the effort to train and have breakfast earlier so he wouldn’t have to experience any awkward encounters before making his retreat to the roof, 

“You know, I’ve seen you up here a couple of times,” Came a voice from the fire escape door behind him. 

Bucky hummed, recognising her as Natasha, a woman he saw as a fairly relatable figure after hearing all she had been through, 

“You can ask me to leave, I won’t take it personally.” She continued, staring into the back of his head, which had still not turned as his gaze stayed transfixed on the city lights below him. 

Natasha shut the door behind her before making her way over to the lone figure,

“It’s kinda cold out here, nobody’s in the kitchen if you wanna be alone-”

“I’m fine.” Bucky snapped, slightly harsher than he intended although Natasha didn’t seem phased, he really wasn’t doing great at this whole ‘team bonding’ thing. 

Natasha nodded, following his empty look as it flickered around the City,

“I know it’s hard,” she said, as Bucky turned to meet her gaze for the first time, “The whole ‘ex-assassin good guy bad guy thing.’”

Bucky let out a soft laugh, they did seem to have quite a niche experience in common,

“You know,” Bucky said, surprising Nat slightly, “I don’t really like New York. Too…  _ polluted _ , I guess,”

“Mm. I guess coming from Wakanda it’s quite the change.” 

They both looked towards the night sky, seemingly soulless as it missed its moon and its stars,

“I just wish,” Bucky sighed, “Sometimes I just wish I could leave it all. I know my… abilities help people but I don’t like the press and the parties and the stress and the fear. I just want to be normal, you know? Maybe that makes me selfish, I don’t know.”

She placed a careful arm onto his metal one, he flinched slightly but didn’t move away as the gears in his arm seemed to speed up, “I get it Buck, I really do. I hate the stupid reporters camping outside of the compound and the paparazzi and the hate and the killing… I hate the killing most of all.”

Bucky brought his metal hand away from her arm, but before she could miss the oddly comforting cool metal beneath her skin he had wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her gently to his side, “I hate the sky too. So miserable. Back in the 40s Steve and I,” Bucky snorted at the memory, “We used to sneak onto old Mrs Bird’s roof, I’d always have to give him a leg up, and we’d see how many stars we could count before we fell asleep. I always won, not that Steve tried much but I’d still tease him ‘bout it the next day.”

It grew quiet as the pair smiled at the memory. 

“Maybe I could go back to Wakanda, one day,” Bucky murmured gently, “Guess I gotta go feed ol’ Stevie, he was my goat back there n well I miss the lil’ fella. You could come too… If you wanted.” 

Nat smirked, “Lot more stars in Wakanda,” 

Bucky grinned, “A lot more stars.”

“One day. When the world’s safe, one day we’ll go visit your goat.” Nat smiled,

“One day.” Bucky repeated, “And we’ll watch the stars.” 


End file.
